Thursday, June 1, 2017

Pirates of the Caribbean 5: Dead Men Tell No Tales


RATING: C+

If one thought the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise was in a bad place after At World's End, it was in an *even worse* spot after On Stranger Tides, which was a muddled mess written by a director who had no experience with action/adventure movies and did not include Orlando Bloom or Keira Knightley and thus didn't have the chance to fix the ending of At World's End. Considering that they were both out for the fourth movie, they shouldn't even have bothered. 

But things are different now. I was interested almost immediately when it was announced that at least Orlando Bloom was returning to play Will Turner. It meant that maybe, just maybe, the mess that At World's End created could be fixed. And then in the final months leading up to the movie, an international trailer revealed Keira Knightley was in it as well. Even if her role was going to be extremely minor, this only furthered my hopes. 

Of course, you can't necessarily make a sequel based upon that issue alone. So they had to come up with something else as well. There are actually kind of two main stories at play here. One centers around Will and Elizabeth's son, Henry (Brandon Thwaites) who is trying to free his father from the Flying Dutchman's curse. The other centers around the latest big bad: yet another "undead" guy in Captain Salazar (Javier Bardem), who is simply after one thing: revenge against Jack Sparrow for trapping him in the "Devil's Triangle" (I have no idea why they call it that when it's apparently just the Bermuda Triangle). Henry and Jack ultimately need to team up to go after a new mystical item: the Trident of Poseidon, which can grant the user control of the seas. Henry believes that he can use it to free his father, and Jack can use it to stop Salazar. Oh yeah, and there's also this girl named Carina Smyth (Kaya Scodelario) who's thrown in there as the new female lead who's also after the Trident... for reasons that are never really made that clear. (More on her later.)

The good news is that Dead Men Tell No Tales definitely gets right much of what On Stranger Tides got so wrong. It's flawed, but it actually kind of *feels* a bit like a proper POTC movie again. It doesn't hardly ever feel boring. The action isn't cut to shreds by camera editing nor does it feel subdued. There isn't as much good levity as I'd like, but at least it felt like they were kind of trying this time. And I guess that's part of the key here: even if the result is a little mixed, they were actually trying this time. 

There is some bad news, however. While Johnny Depp has been the face of the franchise in his role of Jack Sparrow for some time, he ends up taking a bit of an odd backseat in this movie. And unlike previous movies, where he was a bit crazy but still very cunning, he's actually a bit of a bumbling idiot here who gets more lucky even than usual here. The other characters are left to carry the actual plot (Henry, Carina, Barbossa) while Jack is kind of just along for the ride. 

And then there's Carina. Now, much of her character is an area where the filmmakers were trying a little *too* hard at. They were trying so hard to make her not a carbon copy of Elizabeth. They were also trying so hard to make her a more empowered female character. And while there's actually a pretty clever twist about her past later on, the attempt kind of falls flat on its face. Because in those desperate attempts, they forgot to make her an endearing character the average audience could get behind the way they did with Elizabeth. I don't know how much of that is the writing or Scodelario, who isn't a bad actress but is very average compared with Knightley. The only reason *anyone* might care about her at all when it's all said and done is because of the previously mentioned plot twist. 

Among other complaints are the ridiculous forced wedding scene on an island (seriously, how did that even make the final cut?), the fact that according to the men of Britain, because Carina is an astronomer who's also a woman she must be a witch (which is stupid and makes the Britain of that time look increasingly cartoonishly exaggerated), the fact that there is very little to the character of Salazar, how easily the Black Pearl is restored (which also kind of negates the need for the Tia Dalma knock-off witch who's thrown in), and the whole "Trident of Poseidon" thing which manages to succeed at being a super-vague MacGuffin. I also could've done with more Will Turner, who's in the film for a little over five minutes in total--but the ending sort of makes up for that.

There's still some pretty awesome and fun stuff, though. Namely, the "zombie sharks" sequence comes to mind. And there's also the fact that Salazar's ship can actually rise up out of the water partially on one end to help it literally crush other ships; and the visual design of the ship as it's doing this makes it almost look like it's literally *eating* the ships. How awesome is that? There's some other fairly fun action scenes elsewhere too. The plot itself is still interesting, as a bit of further mythology in the POTC universe unfolds and we watch Henry try to free his father--which we actually do care about. The final confrontation, after starting off a bit cliched, ends on a surprisingly big note. And maybe it's just the fact--again--that there aren't really any other film franchises like this, so it's kind of fun to watch regardless as long as the director(s) at least sort of knows what they're doing. (So not Rob Marshall.)

And then there's the ending. I personally think it's very easy to guess what's going to happen before you even go into the movie, but I'll still throw up a "spoiler alert" here if you really don't want to know and you can just skip the following paragraph and go to the final one. 

If you were frustrated and angry by the end of At World's End like I was, then this ending will only be all the more fulfilling for you. It's rather perfect too, because it leaves the franchise in a place where it can finally rest in peace and that would be fine. We can pretty much just pretend On Stranger Tides never happened and just stick with the other four movies. At World's End will be a bit easier to swallow now from here on out with the knowledge that it's ending was fixed later on. And yet, of course, they give us a post-credits tease for if they are able to make another sequel... which may or may not happen. 

Ultimately, the film's audience may admittedly be a bit limited to super-fans of the franchise, and to those who are anxious to see if the ending of At World's End is fixed or not. And that works, because most of that audience will probably be at least somewhat satisfied. Other viewers may not really care at this point, and that's fine. While some people may not realize it, this possibly final installment was actually truly necessary for just one purpose: the ending. And indeed, it is that ending which makes the ride truly worth it. 

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